Weekend 07/10/21

I went out into the Norman Art Walk yesterday evening. It was a nice experience. I saw a person I used to vaguely know shooting a music video. I saw several friends out with their dogs. I looked at art and ate cheeseburgers and watched other people drink beers.

Food trucks, loud music, tons of people milling around. I’d forgotten how much I missed that, the social aspect of life. I’m not much of a loner. It recharged my batteries.

I woke up this morning thinking about death, much like I’d suggested yesterday in the blog. I realized that I myself hadn’t thought about it much, and if I’m going to suggest things, I might try them myself. It’s a bit of a trip. Normally, I have a conception of death as a transition, and that’s what my spiritual and entheogenic experiences suggested. But I thought I might try considering the atheistic idea of total blackness. This is easy to do if you don’t think about it too much. But once you do start thinking about it, it becomes heavy as hell.

The idea of it all just stopping is pretty damn scary, and has an aesthetic quality of sharpness to it. But I also feel clearheaded and calm after engaging in the practice, really trying to go into it. So I’ll keep that up. It feels healthy for now.

Rios is watching Breaking Bad for the first time. I’m enjoying it a lot. It’s my second time through. The first time, I watched it as the episodes came out, and I’m curious how bingeing it will be different from waiting for the episodes to come out. I remember being so pissed when they split season 5 into two halves, with a year between the two chunks of 8 episodes. That’s two different seasons!

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